Buddha's, Smugglers and Worm Tablets... oh and Caterpillar Salad

Yesterday involved all of these things.

Miranda wasn't feeling tip-top (tiredness due to Mosquito bites apparently), so being the caring person I am, I let her sleep and left a note stating my intentions to go and visit Buddha Park.

So, with my backpack in place and rice bowl fitted to my head I set off on the 24km journey to Buddha Park, which Lonely Planet mentions, but gives utterly inadequate detail on how to get there. Anyway, I reached a roundabout, had two options and followed my nose. Around fifteen minutes later following the road along the Mekong, and having to dodge an increasing number of what I've describe as small quarries in the road (potholes, big ones) and shortly after it turned into a dirt road, I realised this may not be the right way.

After promptly spinning the 'beast' around, I headed back to the roundabout where in my best Lao (I have a vocabulary of maybe 4 words by now), where I asked for directions at a scooter repair shop. The guys pointed me to take the only other available road. So on their information I whizzed away down the dual carriageway, heading roughly towards the Friendship bridge. About twenty minutes later I was starting to lose faith, so pulled in at a garage, where I guy pointed (but said nothing), and with that I carried on for another mile. I then pulled into some small roadside cafe, where 4 women greeted me (probably hoping I'd buy something) and learnt my name, and where I was from... eventually I got the information I needed and set off, as the women continued to laugh - the helmet isn't the most flattering thing I've been seen in - with refreshed faith that I was on the right track, I headed up the road, got some more fuel, again re-clarified and, after another 20 minutes landed at a place in the back of beyond, in a tiny village along the Mekong, at yes, Buddha Park.

Before gaining entry, I had to grab some food. The selection was limited to some street vendors, so I took my pick and ended up at some place selling a comprehensive menu of... noodle soup. I grabbed a drink, took a seat and waited patiently as I watched her prepare my food. The funny thing is, non of these places would last a day in the UK, food hygiene is probably akin to the '3 second rule', meaning, if it looks OK, it is OK... oh and don't worry about the flies, they're all part of la familia At this point I can see the value of being vegetarian, which was great because I'd just found out my food had been delivered with a very fresh leaf salad. Let the feast commence...

The soup was huge, full of noodles, herbs, spice, vegetables and meat (some of which was harder to identify), however, sticking to the rule of thumb - always eat where the locals eat - I ploughed on, safe in the knowledge there were also eating it. About this time, I realised that the salad I was eating had some extra protein. I watched 2 Caterpillars walking around freely, I guess also enjoying the salad. At this point I became a full on carnivore, and left my new friends to eat the salad. The meat itself was OK, and 24hrs later I'm still alive, but man's best friend arrived shortly after to help me consume the soup without raising any suspicion that I'd had help with elements of it, I think the dog grew to like me.

Shortly afterwards, I was joined at the table by a Lao guy he was a nice chap seemingly. He was 24, spoke very good Ingerisch, and we enjoyed a decent conversation for probably an hour at the table. Actually it was great to speak to some locals, and swap opinions and exchange views. It came to talking shop, where I explained I (had) worked in IT, based in London. His job was a little different, he basically explained that he smuggled Marijuana across the river to Thailand, with his friends, a few times a week. Lucrative it seems because Thailand's laws see that most people there won't risk growing their own because of the harsher laws. Here in Laos the laws are more flexible, and with the right approach i.e cash, you can buy yourself a certain amount of freedom. In their case, they knew some Lao policeman, that they dealt with, and on the other side of the river, knew some Thai police, who collected the drugs on the other side.... interesting business plan, I'm sure you'll agree. They also had some guns, bought from.... yes, the Thai police for £40, yes, for a handgun!!

Anyway, we went for a stroll around Buddha Park, he explained what he knew of it, having grown up in the same village, and we had a about anything and everything. Right now, I can guess a few of your faces are screwing up, imagining this animal of a druglord, let me assure you, far from it. I trusted him, and I think over the course of the trip, you meet people and you get a nose for sniffing a rat. Anyway, we concluded our walk, I had a look around the park, and he said he was going over the road to his friends house for a few beers (Lao people like to drink, and beer Lao is a good beer), and would I like to join them. Initially I was slightly hesitant, and recognised that there's an element of risk, but after getting to their house, and seeing them all out in the front garden, drinking and chatting away, I figured what the hell not. So there I was, sat around with a group of new friends, chatting and having a good time - I think more than anything they were curious about life in England, and comparisons about things, from music to cars and back.

Unfortunately, I had to call time, as I wasn't much fancying a ride back on the 'ped in full on darkness, though as it happened by the time they'd all said their goodbyes, and how much they liked chatting with "their new Lao friend", James Bond... it was dark. After declining offer of a house party and sleeping at their house, which would of been great, but, obviously as circumstances dictated, it was time to say goodbye.

I got back to the hotel, and we went to eat one of the worst steaks of our trip, polished off with some antibiotics we found in the minimart, for killing worms (to be sure, to be sure) ... Well, you can't have it all!